Monday, November 03, 2008

remark about the strange nausea i feel in the morning,

awake with the cold touching my toes-sticking out of the blanket,

hoping the house is empty,

i am up.

there are some things i instantly look at when i wake:

how worn my desk looks,
my stained floor,
a broken clock set for 9 o' clock,
the streetlight,
palm trees,
see if my brushes have hardened,
how many empty cups are lying around,
stacks of books,

i dread,

hearing footsteps or a television or someone on the phone
knowing there's nothing for breakfast
not having a book to read on the toilet
overbearing heat collected in a room
no one to kiss good morning
someone to kiss good morning

the first word i probably say,

is an affirmation.

rising is painful
succumb at night to relief
between is the substance
that makes the reality,

something happened-
sometimes my eyes are wet,
before i sleep.

1 comment:

Jake said...

i envy your mornings.