Tuesday, December 29, 2009


it comes.
its in the eyes,
they have the capacity to communicate the precise emotion of it, the way it is coming right then.
it can come quick or slow or in sleep and it has no knowing of anything
and it is impossible to communicate one thing to it,
fathom the deep pit,
look inside of it
and it is simply a nothing
abstracted upon.

when you see it come
and when its not for you
there is an awful sense of shame
and empathy,
the shame within yourself
as you cannot do more to help,
and empathy
because it is a common thing
between all things.

the most notable element
is how we run, how we coalesce through the darkness
it has nothing to do with what we make to define anything
its only driven
and it drives
the great universe is at its mercy, the cold halls of space
entertain this darkness too

i cannot swallow
my hearing is out
the storm is fast approaching
and my legs aren't holding
they shake,
and buckle
but my eyes are ready
time upon
let it in
because it was in you

entertain the reaper
flicker past its scythe
touch it like it was it and then
duck away, and smile, flirt

i know that its there
and it will not go away
so let us be friends of understanding
but not friends of overnight stays.

Monday, December 28, 2009


i am the legend;
from the stories about being young and drunk fucked up
fucking, & lost,
all the world
with every head turning for a second
cause they almost know me
with long hair and shades
and not caring
so that they whisper about my daring
maybe i dove off a bridge intoxicated
crashed a car i borrowed through a wall
was leading a revolution
i die only in a glory
smoking cigarettes with the grim reaper
always doing my best
the mindkiller doesn't exist,

yesterday i saw him at the show with a girl
the insatiable
where nothing is enough
just the love of action and adventure
trouble and induction
and from that pours the makings
for the future creation
my friends are all the people
my education comes from all my doings
and that makes me the legend.

Sunday, December 27, 2009

heart of darkness / oil & collage / canvas / 55 x 48 inches
i feel worn and defeated
i don't know where my invigoration is but its lapsed and i am
i crave it
i crave tenderness
i crave a touch so gentle that it almost fades
as if it never was
i want to feel the sunshine
like when i was a child
i want to roam the earth
all smiles
the truth isn't elusive there's so much of it
and all its doing now is taking
me for a beating
like when i climb a mountain, except there is no end
yet, and then i'm still just climbing
and there hasn't been a rest
i keep watching
keep watching
no amount of lying, helps the matter
i need the real thing
whatever it will be
to get me back
into motion.
kindred of the dust
ride away with me,
forgetting what we did wrong
& doing
everything we want.
i'm smiling right behind
feeling the warmth
of your life

with my hands around your stomach
with your blood rhyme
kindred cry
kindred hold

until our bodies,
become light,
so kindred hold
so we shine together
so we shine

Friday, December 25, 2009

edris showed me this and its pretty fucking awesome. merry xmas

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

I want to be alone

I don't care about the outside

right now,
the only thing to want
is to be alone;

to think about the ones that have passed
what happens when they go
to me and you
i want to think about the way
things move
and how that moves
and how the time around us moving
makes us go
me and you

i want to be alone
to know that i am here
to understand how
a flame flickers bright red
and then is black
and no more

there is something stirring
in my chest, from being alone
and it strikes me deep and strong
killing time, making me immortal

when im alone the summed up life
flashes and you focus and you
picking the most definite of moments
keep going, ride along
follow it until you are back to being alone

Friday, December 18, 2009

flowers / oil, acrylic / canvas / 50 x 66 inches

Sunday, December 13, 2009

demonoid is back! : )