Friday, May 26, 2023

agitated

 sometimes i chop stuff down

cause i feel wrong

or told that,

or tired, worn;

sometimes i break things

by mistake or not,

finally lost of fear

dangerous, dumb, done.

mostly i breathe slowly,

remember past tragedies,

carry on.

Tuesday, May 23, 2023

the stars above us

 i sit by the fire surrounded by desert and look:

In front of me the flames take shapes,

i feel free and settled, and they speak;

deep within my cells the history of my all my pasts unfolds slowly with the heat and outer blanket darkness, and those times tell stories like when you used to camp with friends and family.


The rocks are witness.

The craggy outlines and holes penetrate the meaning. Im left to wonder.

The stars above also consuming matter, and gravity thuds the pit another log for the flames.

As night passes the moon rise quickens and all living things attend to the heavenly transer between star and celestial body.

The fur of other beasts and plants coats the body, and at some point also sizzles and splatters, crucified / sacrificed in the name of lofty purpose. 

Depending on the adventure the desert can beckon with many diversions, pleasures, past times, or meditations.

Bold adventurers sample whatever offered.

Call your name,

So much emptiness answers.

I settle gently, still by the fire.

As it embers my eyes whisper dreamy,

thankful for the mojave.

Thursday, May 11, 2023

future holds

 utah money, on the backs if dinosaurs;

destined for Los Angeles, and too old

to be a fun wag.

Best wishes greeting card

bout the bayo sandwich shoppe.

Make revenue, french press business.

Gangster Katies past the bullshit balls

INQUISITORS.

Along the coast somewhere,

a child named ocean, a digital nomad,

designs a collective consciousness

where a swath of awe inspired mammals

vibe out forever ditching their wasted copsules.

Come on,

a tendon pulled forever long

that tensions together with

the void.

Monday, May 08, 2023

radio vibe hearthrob

remind me

 

i feel like i am now,

a terrible dreamer

in the shadows of larger buildings

without soul.

i couldn't be much farther,

but they be far, and peaceful arms 

in the hands of shady diplomats, staves / olives / bars;

the side im on, i feel im all got, and we've never won.

how long to the future plan,

im not what anyone wants. but im brave. im not afraid.

courage in parts, take my hands - im thinking of you.

blowing in the wind, smiling, wild, life escaping us, 

romance and finding places in trust.

i could gather,

envisioned tangled beneath breaths.

imagined in a room, b u m contemplated 

lost control dreamed in synths of sun singing...

little ducks following footprints.   ...

Tuesday, May 02, 2023

lop my cleaver with an eyelash

 its the little anxieties

that manifest

over time, the shape the body

and memory

the leftover path of a worm

is our brains.

Feet rubbed over and over,

by each other. terrible seconds before 

the begining. wasted shudders

from reliving the thinking. 

Developing recombinant patterns

while we lay helplessly asleep,

like victims, like tragedies, like comedies.

We are complex jokes for simple things like stars.

we smoke, we vibe;

perilous travels the fusion in a vacumn.

Fucking snoring,

I was writing.



Wednesday, March 22, 2023

oh ache more

 lost are the ways we were,

losers in endless dreams,

in total sense of self we need love,

stand apart together now,

grieve the guild of broken hearts,

long in shadow growing dark,

give me something more than this,

hug me tightly like the final wish.

Wednesday, February 22, 2023

scenic shot

 a pot boils at the edge

Ledgley a bird watches

Meat cooking fire,

Inside the brothy turmoil

Of cold wind fights,

And a dog gnaws on corncob.

----

 


Tuesday, February 21, 2023

tumbling & stumbled toes on hard ground

 the arc of towels

across the sky

leaving a window

in a metaphorical escape

from this place.

defined location as wherever

exits must exist

for those who feel themselves

in the quicksand.

Wednesday, January 25, 2023

strategy and strategems

superstitious artifact,

suspect / evil / intent,

suspicious outcomes,

detonate! ,

how do i remove thy prescene,

from the home,

from the heart,

from the hearth

where residential existence resides.

i have tried most everywhere &

feel restless

about the cause;

long and far away are my memories of warmer times.

even without fire,

even betrayed by change,

let me feast on whatever platter

comes.


 

soulkeeper / oil / red oak / 13 x 17 inches

Monday, January 09, 2023

rum runner / new year / 2023

 Its one of those quiet nights where the waitress tells you she has an ingrown toe nail and knocks on wood. "The night isnt too busy." Theres a guy named gary eating soup in a corner and ive seen him walking around the neighborhood. Its weird to me that im a dad. I have a nearby bar i like. Theres a regulars. Oh fuck they know my name. Its comforting. We battle over the jukebox. The floors are wood and the walls are stone. Theres pool tables. I feel somehow lost and embraced. Im in the middle of the best part of a daring adventure. A corner, some ale. The buzz of humans. Come on! Come on! The hustlers are playing pool tonight. I love small communities so much easier to wrap my head around the variables. I dont care about the wins or losses it all amounts to the same ledger but what about all the heart behind every choice. Gary slurps his soup and all is right with the world. It has to be enough to get me to bed finally when its all over.

 

---

*there's a place in my phone with a running commentary of all the food pickups and moments of existence my experience(s), before being thrown back in the fray.

 

---

i walk far

when little eyes

wont close.