ceremony / oil, acrylic / canvas / 23 x 27 inches

my love feels like a blood red sunset
& I am covered in feathers,
the part of me that is knowing,
how deeply affected anyone,
can be,
the sea is like an infinite wisdom
sparingly is the infinity gleamed,
why some sunsets are finished quickly
& some are forever fires in the sky
I know mine to be blood red
& I like it
A pulsating form in front of your eyes,
with privilege comes rebellion,
and my love gives me all the liberty
I need.

back from san francisco. dealing with lots of computer stuff. will have work up when ive taken care of all that.

sometimes i dont even have a reason. its just this feeling i get that i guess someone who has a car they just like to drive, or a book they just read through the pages of over and over again, or like when you just like the thing for what it is so sometimes it doesnt need a purpose for its use. sometimes i just like to click the computer screen, open programs that don't need opening, click the start button and watch the menu pull out. and itll be different for every computer, each one has its own unique rhythm which is created by the different users of the machine itself. working through a person's computer shows you innate details of their way of being, and something ive realized working on them is ive incorporated myself into every machine ive touched. inherently i take the machine with my hand and i began to change it for everything i do, and then i leave, and the machine is new and different. i like how if ive run a machine through its pases, and i come back to it in the distant future, i will have known that i have touched it. sometimes i just click and click and click and its not to open something but im establishing the feedback of how long the computer takes to respond to each click; by doing that i know the speed of the machine, at how its actually calculating and not based solely on its hardware specifications. this allows me to understand the most critical tasks first, what i must establish within the system so it becomes more fluid and without stalling. it is sad when you realize that the personality of the machine is fine but that the hardware inside is dying. it is happy when new parts come together and breathe fresh air into the machine's paces. i learn to know how it acts. the problem if there is one isn't that its wrong for it to be doing that but by wanting to understanding why that behavior is taking place. sometimes there is no reason, but i just want to feel the way it moves like if i wanted to take a bicycle out and pump my legs and feel the air and then go down the hill and ride and ride and ride.

there is no price
you can claim
on what it is for someone to love you so deeply
they'd do anything,
there is no aesthetic or motion
so powerful, so sublime and powerful
as the love of someone for you
the way it courses through someones veins
as it strikes the heart
at every aching second
no way
is there anything that merges us like
colors,
imagine the diver at the very top
who splashes against the water
and see the way a child plays with nothing
the unspeakable is upon us
and it is love
in a glory.

a sunny day / oil, acrylic / canvas / 48 x 60 inches

ways to be

something about work / the importance of finding work meaningful
being persistent and not giving up on things easily
allowing oneself to empathize consciously / so that /
it happens unconsciously.
listening to people / asking questions / engage,
let yourself have fun, go seek fun, adventure / going outside
be open / speak clearly what's on your mind / don't let things brood,
do not be afraid / do not be afraid to approach a person if you feel that,
there is a specific reason for it,
read
golden rule / judgements can be dangerous, they can tell you a lot

about yourself.

be honest / don't withhold if you are being honest
right to silence / silence is like the universe,
don't be afraid of being clear even if it may be painful
try / trying leads to knowing
breathe.

nights / oil / canvas / 36 x 38 inches

flowers / acrylic, oil / canvas / 36 x 46 inches

below the sea / acrylic, oil / canvas / 21 x 28 inches

Doe people

Don’t spend any time

Identifying,

Predators make meals

Out of everything

The infinite time around us

Plays with how we see,

I play with your hair
I watch you sleep
I am still when you are absent
I am curious about the life you live

When the hour of sleep is approaching
The definition of your body is what I need
Lost in the sunlight
Are our hands
Forgotten in time
Are our lonely selves,

You are the rapture
of the heart.

how to deal

Theres nothing to do about it
Theres only the doing
If you don’t take the thing
And make it an abstraction
And bring it back, then you’ve disgraced
Whatever it is you’re thinking about-

You didn’t bring it inside
You didn’t empathize
You were clumsy and stupid
About something you should have loved
About the way you work

Its never too late
To start trying,

All it takes
Is knowing that you’re gonna die
And cause of that
Everything counts
Its all you got
And all you need.