i dont know what to tell myself to make anything better. i like going to the movies alone. its always a spur of the moment thing. something will shake me or just mess me up in my head and i need a way to escape so i check the listings on fandango real quick and pick something i want to see. i bring some whiskey with me in a flask and buy a matinee ticket. i usually always try and go to the suncoast because its older than most of the places up in summerlin and it lets me avoid the red rock casino which sucks and is always packed and full of teenagers from palo verde and i just hate the vibes there. the suncoast is old and smelly and low key and the only people inside are all the retirees from sun city. so i get my ticket, walk awkwardly up to the ticket taker cause there is a bulge in my pants from the hidden flask. the guy is either disabled or mentally handicap and once he tears my stub i walk through. if i go to the left when i enter the actual theater room i go to the right because i think most people will stick to the left since they were conditioned in the beginning to go to the left and then vice versa if i am going to the right. i sit down far up high where no one is usually sitting and i watch the movie. since i am alone i am never thinking about anyone else or worrying about what they might be thinking or thinking about what i might have to do or considering anything outside of myself because i dont have to since no one is there and then its just media coma and a kind of static bliss watching the screen and the movies are usually pretty good and i sip a little here and there and when its over i think for a minute, duck out, walk quick to my car, drive the couple of minutes back to my house since the suncoast is right down the street and i usually get to painting. sets me pretty okay most of the time.